At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I forgot how hot balto sounded
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
