There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize