ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
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I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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