I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
