Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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