and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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