I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Panties = found
Randomize
