Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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