yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
