This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
