I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
