Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
