Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
