I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.