i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
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new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
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No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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