Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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