Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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