on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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