Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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