the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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