OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Randomize
