You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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