I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Maybe he injected his testicle?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize