He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
