if you like me you must not know who I am
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
