For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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