I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
