This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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