would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
