doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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