I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Randomize