it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
