How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
As shirtless as possible
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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