No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
im holly from the hills drunk
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
