am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
