Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
