dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
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Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
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I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
So vagazzling was a success
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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