Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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