So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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