I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
