i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
So many bounce houses so little time
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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