Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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