I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
pop tarts are not kleenex
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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