Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
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