Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Welp...herpes.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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