We won't sleep together?
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
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