Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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