I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
