She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
