i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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