Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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