All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
