Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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