At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I think I won the penis lottery.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Randomize